A paixão chega de repente na vida das pessoas e, sem pedir licença, se instala, preenche todos os espaços e o outro por quem se está apaixonada passa a ser a mais importante fonte de gratificação e afeto. Não há como negar, a sensação de estar apaixonada (desde que correspondida, claro) é inigualável em razão das descargas de anfetaminas produzidas pelo organismo, tomando conta de corações e mentes Mas, isso não dura pra sempre! – segundo os especialistas, essa ebulição de emoções dura em média de dois a três anos e depois acaba e, a partir daí, ou esse sentimento se transforma em amor ou não fica nada e o relacionamento termina.
Então, quando o amor acontece é natural que os enamorados decidam casar, construir uma família, ter filhos e envelhecer juntos é o sonho de consumo afetivo deles; mas, nem sempre as coisas acontecem dessa maneira e o pra sempre se acaba e, muitas vezes, de uma forma nada amigável e tranquila, principalmente quando o rompimento se dá em função de infidelidade conjugal. Na verdade, como o amor não costuma acabar ao mesmo tempo para os dois e muito menos por uma decisão de ambos, quem propõe o término do relacionamento está mais seguro e inteiro pra seguir a vida, enquanto que o outro pode precisar de um tempo maior para se refazer e voltar a ter o controle sobre suas emoções.
O AMOR NÃO GARANTE TUDO
O amor continua sendo o principal ingrediente para um casamento feliz, mas não é tudo! Para que se realize o desejo de viver a felicidade e segurança de um relacionamento amoroso é preciso que as pessoas não idealizem muito o parceiro e nem projetem nele coisas que na verdade são delas e fazem parte dos seus desejos e sonhos. Também, não é bom para a saúde do relacionamento que alguém se anule, se esqueça de viver a sua própria vida e passe a incorporar em seu cotidiano apenas o que considere que seja interesse e desejo do parceiro. Em qualquer dessas circunstâncias fica difícil o amor sobreviver!
Tudo o que acontece no dia a dia de cada um de nós é fruto de nossas escolhas e investimentos. Se o seu desejo é o de construir um vínculo de intimidade e afeto com alguém, não abra mão da sua individualidade; valorizar as afinidades e respeitar as diferenças é o melhor caminho para você não se perder de você mesma e ao mesmo tempo contribuir com a construção de uma vida a dois, em que ambos possam viver seus projetos pessoais e crescer juntos.
CONTAR COMIGO
A vida não dá certezas pra ninguém e sendo assim, nem sempre as coisas acontecem do jeito que a gente idealizou, pois os desejos dos outros, muitas vezes, não coincidem com os nossos. Mas uma coisa é certa, você pode contar sempre com você mesma nos momentos de precisão desde que você tenha aprendido a preservar suas circunstâncias, seus interesses, seus afetos e suas escolhas na vida sejam negociadas com as pessoas envolvidas em seu projeto pessoal de amor e felicidade.
Essa música maravilhosa do Ivan Lins que diz “Começar de novo e contar comigo, vai valer a pena ter amanhecido. Ter me rebelado, ter me debatido, ter me machucado, ter sobrevivido. Ter virado a mesa, ter me conhecido, ter virado o barco, ter me socorrido” sintetiza tudo o que a gente pode fazer por nós mesmos sempre que a necessidade de recomeçar se fizer presente. Pois é, lembre-se disso toda vez que você precisar mudar o rumo da sua vida e trilhar novos caminhos!
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